Welcome to the Land of the Lostboy. Wondering what you're getting yourself into? Alright. Here's a description (and, perhaps, a warning):

The Land of the Lostboy is a number of things.

First and foremost, it is the product of years of self-examination (no, not that kind of examination, you perv!). I figure, if I'm going to do a website about myself, I might as well be as thorough as possible because, let's face it, I'm weird (or, at the very least, complicated). If you're going to get an accurate picture of me and who I am, then you're going to have to know a lot about me. To this end, the Land contains a lot of information about me: about what I believe and what I want.

And yes, this is as much an exercise for myself as it is for you -- by organizing my thoughts, philosophies and politics, this allows me to have a better understanding of myself. This may seem pretentious and self-indulgent; and perhaps it is. On the other hand, I often wish other people would spend some time really thinking about who they are before trying to impose their ideas on me. After all, how can you know what you really want unless you know who you really are? And if you don't know what you really want, you're not likely to ever get it. So, hopefully, you will leave this place with a better picture of both of us (this is where the pretentiousness comes in), even if you come away knowing only that you are nothing like me.

Obviously, we wouldn't get very far if this wasn't also somehow entertaining. So, the Land is, hopefully, a fun place to be with lots of things to see and do -- a virtual psychological amusement park, if you will. This is the inside of my brain; this is the inside of my brain on drugs; you must be at least this tall to go on this ride. You get the idea. After all, I'm not a completely sanctimonious asshole -- that's just one side of me.

And lastly, this is a way for me to learn HTML, Java, and all of the other web-related technologies. Thus, the Land is likely to change, periodically, as I learn more about this stuff. Continental drift, ya know. As such, links may change indiscriminantly. So, if you have plans on bookmarking any of this, I'd suggest you bookmark the Gateway which is unlikely to change anytime soon.

Keep in mind that the Land is open and free. If you have anything that you'd like to contribute to it, let me know (go visit the mailbox and drop me a line). Keep in mind, also, that the Land is more-or-less uncensored, unplugged, unedited and uncut. Thus, it may contain things that you might find offensive -- if only the occasional use of foul language, comprendez-vous?

Note that there isn't a whole lot of explanation as to where things are in the Land. This is deliberate. This is supposed to be an exploration, after all. But, if you get completely lost, go to the information booth. That might help. Note, also that the contents of the Land are likely to grow and change. What you see there now certainly ain't all there is.

So, if after reading all of this (you did read all of this, didn't you?) you still want to check the place out, go back to the Gateway and knock on the gates to gain admittance. Thanks and see you on the other side!

Note about browsers:
By the way, the Land was created primarily with Netscape Navigator using 1024x728 resolution (although, 800x600 should work fine). I've tried to make the Land readable by any browser, but you may experience the occasional seismic anomaly should you choose to explore in an IEmobile or some other browser. Note that the Land uses frames and tables. So, if you want to roam the Land, your browser will need to be capable of interpreting these things.

Also, the Land relies heavily on client-side image maps. If your browser does not support such things, then you are truly lost! However, you can still wander around blindly by going here.